How does it feel when your life changes for the better? I ask myself that on the bus on my way home. I am wiping the sweat off my brow and breathe deeply. I look out the window and notice, as if for the first time, the red and white lights of the bars and 7-Elevens on the bus route. I look at the bright blackess of the man next to me and at the dirty newspaper on the floor. I take it all in, and it is all beautiful to me. I love it. It is my new home.
I am moving from the suburbs of Boston into Central Square. This is something I didn’t think I was going to do this year, and now that I am actually doing it, that it is actually happening, it seems like the best decision I have ever made. I deserve to be happy all the time, not only when I remember to decide to. I want to buy a fish and name him Bobby, and a plant and name her Ana. I want to cook chocolate souffle and beouf bourguignon a la Julia Child. I want to sit and watch stupid tv shows at midnight in my blue fleece robe and feel at home on the livingroom couch. And if I fall asleep there, I want to feel warm and cozy.
I want to love every second of every day, the smell of the butterscotch candle on the night table and the morning ritual of choosing my earrings. I want to worry about my heart bursting with happiness, and about the fact that I can’t see all my friends in the same week. Because I have too many.
I want to be able to keep my promisses to myself. I want to start running this spring, and write at least three times a week in the blog, and keep in touch better with all my friends, and dream more. And make my dreams come true.
It all starts with a moment. The moment when you realize every opportunity is right in front of you. So reach out and grab it. You’ll be surprised what it’s willing to offer you in return for its freedom.
Diana Goes to America 